This lesson was written by one of our partners, Tericia. I know you will be blessed by it.
When I woke up today, I had two choices. I could choose to allow this to be a difficult day emotionally, reminding me of what happened one year ago and all of the stress and heartache that it caused; OR I could choose to allow this day to be a marking stone in my life. One that notes the growth and change God has made in my faith journey.
I started the day choosing emotional difficulty; I had been planning to have a difficult day for a while. It is as if I wanted to torture myself by reliving the pain and agony of betrayal. It was not until I encountered a devotional based on Proverbs 4:23 – “Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts” (GN) that I realized I could choose to have a great day regardless of what anniversary it marked. God wants me to let go of the pain, not relive it! He wants me to learn from the pain, not lean on it! He wants me to praise him through the storms, not pray to avoid them!
As I look back over the past 12 months, I am amazed at how far I have come in this difficult journey. I remember at times lying on the hard concrete of the back porch weeping and wailing to God that my heart was breaking, to please stop the pain. I remember telling Him that I believed His promises to be there always and that I knew I would survive the pain and difficult times, but right in the moment, I was not feeling it. At that precise moment, I could not see the light nor feel the joy. I felt as if I would be in that emotional turmoil forever. I turned my tear-stained face to Him and thanked him then for the joy I knew He would bring me, just in case I forgot to thank Him when the joy arrived! That began to turn the corner for me. No, I did not get all the answers. My marriage did not miraculously heal; my husband did not turn away from his poor choices. However, my heart began to heal in God’s promises. I thanked Him daily for the joyous end he would bring to my heartache and pain. I thanked Him for how He would work in my husband’s life, despite the fact that our marriage likely would end. I thanked him for the solutions I knew He would bring, even if I did not know what they would be. Some of those solutions are still His secret. That’s ok. I know He is AWESOME and Lord of all. He can and will have His will in my life. He will use me to bring Him praise. That is amazing!
I choose today to let go of the past and look for the awesome, amazing miracles He has planned for my life today, right now. Storms will come. That’s fine. I have built my life on the solid rock of Jesus, and to quote one of my favorite songs, “I will praise you in this storm, and I will lift my hands because you are who you are, no matter where I am. And every tear I cry, you hold in your hands. You never left my side. Though my heart is torn, I will praise you in this storm.” Praise Him today, forever.
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